Balance

I hang in the balance,

I've lost my mojo.

Tell me your thoughts,

So I don't feel like a yo-yo.

This game is dangerous;

We go back and forth.

Tell me should I stay,

Or carry on North?

Our paths are different,

But our hearts the same.

Why keep up this charade?

Life is not a game.

And if you wish for it,

Just the same as I do,

Let your guard down,

Tell me your wish true.

We'll ride the wave,

We'll make it last.

We'll pass any hurdle,

That's our way cast.

But darling, before that,

I must know for sure;

Are you in it for good,

Or will you walk out the door?

Hello, New Year!

Before I started writing this, I went back and read the note I wrote at the beginning of 2014.

I realised everything that I had promised myself had more or less gone down the drain. Now, I’m wondering whether this is just me, or does this happen to a lot of people? I’m not one to make resolutions for the new year, never have been. But, I do hope to learn from the past and use that to avoid repeating the same mistakes in the future.

Last year, I promised myself a few things. To extricate myself from complicated situations and the company of negative people, for instance. Can’t say I managed to do that well, but in my defence, I tried. I also promised to learn from my past mistakes. Golly gee, did I throw that out the window! 2014 was the one year I made the most glorious mistakes; mistakes I’m likely to remember (if not pay for) for the rest of my life, ones that some of my not-so-sane-minded friends would be proud of me for making. But I’m also glad I made them. They’ve taught me so much about myself. I now know me better.

If I thought 2013 had been epic, 2014 completely blew that out of the water. With no job uncertainties to worry about, and with enough dough to spend, I had an unbelievable year. From travelling (solo and with friends and family) to three new countries, to finding a dance form that I love and am determined to pursue seriously, life has, in general, been very good to me.

In that sense, everything that I wished for at the start of 2014, came true. The year exceeded all expectations I had of it. And the mistakes I made (yes, I keep coming back to those) were great stepping stones as well. I’m a different person, thanks to them.

As for what 2015 will bring, I’m not going to set any goals or expectations for myself. Of course, I do hope that it’s a good year, but beyond that, I will just deal with whatever is thrown my way. Make fewer mistakes? Easier said than done. Earn more money? Will work harder for it. Achieve greater heights and be more awesome? That’s a lifelong aim; not just one for the new year!