Venting My Thoughts

What it takes to piss someone off

2012-01-05T04:18:00.000-08:00

For the longest time, I've been a crusader for the political, judicial, social and defence systems of India. Whenever somebody has called the police 'rishvatkhor', I have pointed out the likes of Hemant Karkare, the ex-ATS chief who died in the line of duty, and others. I am even okay with corrupt politicians, so long as they are doing good work – work that they are meant to do. What is the government doing about the city's infrastructure? I point to the various skywalks which people conveniently forget to use; the bridges that, while they were being built, earned several brickbats for the Shiv Sena (who propagated and pushed for their construction), but which today are a boon for the city.

So when someone who has always backed the country's lawmakers and keepers gets pissed at them, it has to really be the result of absolute frustration – frustration that comes at the end of a feeling of helplessness. Yes, I am pissed off. At the fact that a little girl gets asked to get off the local bus for not having change. At the fact that there is no place to walk on the city's streets. At the fact that people do not follow traffic rules. At the fact that roads are constantly under construction and nothing ever seems to get built. I am complaining for the first time in the 22 years of my existence on Earth. I would like, as a non-complaining individual, to have my issues redressed, by people who genuinely give a damn about the country; enough to drag it back from the hell that it is fast hurtling towards.

The common man complains only when something directly affects him – the same is the case with me. I tried to put up with it – but for how long? I'm not an unreasonable person, one who would knock on the President's door because someone ran a red light. But when every day I have to wait indefinitely to cross the main road because the light at the Saifee Ambulance junction of E. R. Road doesn't mean squat and people have to take a chance and cross on a whim, yes, it pisses me off. I get scared to say ‘no’ to run an errand for my mother. Why? Because if she has to do it herself, she will have to go through that same shit to get to the other side of the road to finish it. But she’s arthritic and can't do the ridiculous dance expected of her to get across a street where there are black and white stripes on the road (as if mocking everyone) and a traffic light just above her head as she waits to cross. At such times, yes, I do get pissed off.

So here’s the deal. What is going to be done about it? Probably nothing. What am I doing about it besides venting my frustration through words? Nothing. But maybe I can appeal to pedestrains to follow signals. Maybe then the vehicle drivers will be shamed into stopping when the light turns red. Maybe I will send this letter to a newspaper’s editor. Maybe I will do something about it. What are you going to do?

AIRBORNE

2011-12-20T09:45:00.001-08:00

I was born out of the air,
Meant to live free.
So don't come around now,
Telling me it's not to be.

You don't know me at all,
Know nothing about who I am.
You don't even know from whence I come,
What is my next plan.

Into the future no one can see,
But one can certainly hope;
Hope to make a difference,
No matter on how small a scope.

I learn from my mistakes,
Making amends as I go,
Don't put me on a pedestal,
I'm not a piece to show.

Every little dream of mine
I preciously hold to my heart.
I will do whatever it takes,
To give myself a start.

I'm on my way to glory,
Over the years I've grown;
It won't be too long now,
Before I'm airborne.

From Bombay Meri Jaan to Mumbai Le Le Jaan

2011-11-05T09:50:00.000-07:00

Outrage. Anger. Frustration. Bloodlust. These are just some of the emotions coursing through the veins of every Mumbaikar, or at least every Mumbaikar with a conscience at this point in time. The trigger – the Keenan Santos and Reuben Fernandez incident at Amboli.

For those who are unaware — and I don’t know how that possibly might be true — these two young men were stabbed to death for facing up to hooligans who sexually harassed a girl. The question in everyone’s mind is – how could this possibly happen?

The answer is simple – when people around are so dead within their souls, so mindfuckingly numb to everything but that which concerns them directly, then yes, this is possible. And in this incident one might say that the goons were many in number and were armed, which is why nobody tried to help the two bravehearts. Fine. Answer this, then. A colleague at work told me about this incident which drove the final nail in the coffin of Mumbai’s ‘safe’ status, for me. A few days ago, in a BEST bus (and everyone knows how crowded they can be), a man tried to act fresh with a girl. I don’t know details, but, in response, the girl turned around and slapped him. The bastard slapped the girl so hard, that she flew against the railing behind the driver. If this were not enough, the motherfucker tore apart the girl’s shirt and when she slapped him again, he kept molesting her again and again. And how could this POSSIBLY occur in a local bus full of so-called human beings who are fucking-excuses-for-what-call-themselves MEN? Same reason as the Santos/Fernandez incident could take place. And this was even more shameful, considering it was just ONE son-of-a-fucker who was completely unarmed. So yes, maybe the people on the bus were scared and worried about being safe because they had to think of their families. Well, all the men who were on that bus that day, and I hope at least SOME of you see this, I hope you picture your sisters/mothers/wives/girlfriends/grandmothers in place of that girl the next time you think about the episode. THAT is my curse to you. Now let me know if you can sleep peacefully at night. It seems the girl hurled abuses at the ‘men’ before getting off the bus. She called them eunuchs. I wouldn’t have. Because they were not even human, much less eunuchs. I believe eunuchs would stand up against such injustice. And what were the women doing? My friend (and I was disappointed in her for this) was crying. But why couldn’t a couple of women stand up and beat the fuckhead up? All it would take would be two or maybe three women. What happened to their souls? Are they so dead from all the molesting that they go through that it’s become routine? And so this seemed like nothing out of the blue?

All of these mindnumbing incidents have finally convinced me of something which I had known to be true for a while now, but was trying to forget. Others told me that was not the case, and I tried to believe them. But the fact can no longer be ignored – the city is changing. There’s something evil brewing within it, waiting to spread. And the people — the kind who commit such heinous crimes, as well as the kind who stand by and watch while it happens — are the hosts to this parasite. What they don’t realise is that this parasite is going to infect their lives so badly (and I hope to god that it does), that they will beg to die and not be granted that relief.

So yes, there was a time when I, at age 12, could return home all alone from a class at midnight with not a care in the world. Today, a decade later at 22, I am a bit apprehensive about travelling alone beyond 10/11pm. These incidents condition women to feel lucky if they return safe at night, rather than feel that it’s their right to be safe in this city that is the Mayanagari. The Mayanagari is changing. The sinister underbelly is boiling. And when nobody gives a fucking rat’s ass about it, the temperature only goes up and, those fuckers out on the streets only get bolder.

The Bombay city of dreams is no more. What has been left behind in its place is a dirty, filthy Mumbai that everyone believes is their oyster, that they can do as they choose with it, because clearly, nobody is going to touch them, no matter what their crime. The CM says the goons who harassed the girl and stabbed Keenan and Reuben should be hanged. Well, I will believe it when I see it. Until then, this city will be alien to me, a city that has gone from being the love of our lives, to the city that wants to snatch our lives.

For anyone who can still claim to have a soul, please, do sign up for this petition: SIGN A PETITION FOR ZERO TOLERANCE Petition | GoPetition

Life's Like That

2011-10-24T12:32:00.000-07:00

Life is the cherry,

Upon the Universe’s cake.

You can be merry,

Or put everything at stake.

You could take life as it comes,

Or just let go,

For it will take its own course,

Like a Broadway show.

Put it in hibernate mode

And hit the snooze button;

Before you know it,

Your troubles will be forgotten.

But worry incessantly

And nothing will be got,

Except a massive headache

And you’ll have your happiness shot.

Treat it like a princess,

But remember there’s a catch;

The princess is a Damsel in Distress

To whom you have to prove your match.

So don’t worry my friend,

Whatever will be, will be.

Ke sera or not,

Can any alternative you see?

Most likely you won’t

And in that is a lesson, a fact;

Don’t worry too much,

‘Cause life’s just like that!

Contradictions!

2011-09-15T10:57:00.001-07:00

So they say 'Make hay while the sun shines'. But they also say 'Think before you leap'. Okay, so it isn't the best analogy to serve as point and counterpoint. But here's the thing: us humans are a confused lot. Why? Here's why.

How many movies must we have watched wherein the guy falls in love with a girl thinking she's the 'one', but who eventually turns out to be all wrong for him? Who's the right girl for him? His not-so-glamorous best friend, of course. He realises his mistake, and guy and best friend live happily ever after. Now consider this scenario (Note - this scenario is more likely in TV shows): Guy falls in love with girl. Guy asks girl out. Girl says yes, but then things don't work out. OR, girl says no for one of various reasons (career/family/personal morals, etc. etc.) So guy, after moping around for a while, gets over it, and finally finds someone else, someone he's 'truly' happy with. Until he finds out that the 'first' love is real, the current one is, much though he would like to deny it, a sort of consolation. So back he goes to the first love, and now they live happily ever after.

So my question is this: Which of the scenarios does one believe? Or are we just supposed to decide that based on who the 'hero' and 'heroine' of the movie/serial are, and accordingly be happy for the end, whichever way it may go?

This is what I wrote in my SOP: George Eliot asks in Adam Bede, “How is it that the poets have said so many fine things about our first love, so few about our later love?” If she were alive today, I’d have liked to propose a plausible answer to her. Poets talk only about the first love because it is the most intense, the most uncorrupt, the most sacred and the most powerful love. If a person is lucky, that love will stay with them for the rest of their lives. If not, they will learn to love again. But never will they forget that first love.

But how about when Ryan Erikson (no idea who he is, but makes a lot of sense!) says: "The road to finding 'the one' is paved with a bit of promiscuity."

Having said that, though, I come back to the same point I made earlier. Which is correct? Which do you believe?

Confusing, us humans are!

All that is wrong

2011-08-02T11:55:00.000-07:00

There are days when you manage to forget everything. All your worries, all your pain. One almost succeeds in convincing oneself that all is well with the world.

But then something happens. Something that reminds us that all isn't really well. It could be a look from a neighbour, a word from a colleague, the silence of a friend, the elusiveness of a best mate - that's all it takes to remind us of all that is wrong in their world; that's all it take to remind of all that is wrong in ours.

Yes, so hang me, it's in defense of Sachin!

2011-07-26T08:35:00.000-07:00

A friend suggested I read this post, not without good prior warning. The warning: not something you will like, but check it. So check it, I did. What was the post about? It was pretty much a question mark about Sachin Tendulkar's greatness. Yes, the author does say, "This isn't a criticism. Though it probably should be. This is more like a plea," but the question that he raises remains the same. Why did Sachin fail us at Lord's?

Now, yes, I am a self-confessed psycho Tendulkar fan who doesn't understand how or even why anybody can have anything against this man. But that aside, I can read a negative post about him (after much hemming and hawing) if it is constructively written. This one, though, I believe isn't constructive at all. It mentions that Sachin has the ability to block out everything else and concentrate on his game. A commendable quality indeed, the author agrees. But, he argues, Sachin should have taken the energy at Lord's and allowed himself to be driven by that energy to play better than he did. So does that mean, in effect, that the author wants the God to give up his perfection to garner the energy at Lord’s? Give in this once, to achieve what the author might think is a more desirable result, just to give in every time? And had he done so, who’s to guarantee it would have helped?

Yes, Lara won the Windies that game against Australia, but hasn’t Tendulkar not stuck around irrespective of his personal health to provide support to a side? One may argue about the validity of this claim, but I am certain if asked, a lot of the Indian players will agree that having Tendulkar stand opposite them provides a sense of reassurance unlike any other. Is that any less of an achievement that Lara’s? Lara won them that one match. Again, I do not mean to detract from Lara's achievements. He's one of my favourites too. But Tendulkar won us countless by just ‘being there’. Just let it be known that the man got a century in the first innings at Lord's while suffering from a fever, and I rest my case.

Again, I have nothing (other than complete dumbfoundedness, if it’s a word) against those who are opposed to Sachin. And this author seems not to be one of those men. Pray why, then, this post? You are looking for one Tendulkar moment of glory at Lord’s, I just look forward to the moment when it comes, no matter where.

Mumbai Blasts

2011-07-13T10:23:00.000-07:00

Having recently returned from a holiday, I thought my next post would be about the experiences I had there. But that will have to wait. Another thing must take precedence over it. A more important, but a far sadder event.

The Mumbai blasts which took place today, July 13, 2011 - at Opera House, Dadar and Zaveri Bazar - were a really sad welcome to the city. So far, over 20 lives have been lost and more than 100 people have been injured. Amid all this, there are rumours floating around about terrorist Ajmal Kasab - it is said it's his birthday today. Then they say it was a false alarm; then again they claim that it is his birthday according to the Urdu calendar. I have one question - Who the F cares when the man was born, when all we are praying for at this point is when he will die?!

It's at times like these that one really appreciates life. I was in Zaveri Bazaar just a week ago; a friend was there until 5 minutes before the blast happened! How is one supposed to know which place is safe anymore? Of course we can't know. So we're just supposed to say a little prayer and step out of the house, hoping we'll get back safely. WHY?

As Naseeruddin Shah says in A Wednesday, "We're not resilient by choice, we're resilient by force". Do we choose to be resilient now? But if we do, are we going to be forced to retaliate in a much worse way in the not-so-distant future?

Voices in my head

2011-05-17T10:44:00.000-07:00

Voices in my head,

Are you all dead?

You’re supposed to warn me,

Not to do anything stupid.

Instead you desert me,

Just when I need it.

And then I do what I most fear,

Speak before I think, putting in danger all that I hold dear.

Before you know it,

The earth has from under me shifted;

Shifted so that I am buried,

Deep into an abyss towards which I had for long drifted.

But it’s your fault, oh voices,

For not warning me.

For not alerting me to the dangers that lurk beyond,

For not telling me anew,

How crazy things can get,

If I don’t listen to you.

Voices in my head,

You used to tell me all;

You used to remind me,

Of things great and small.

And yet now you are silent,

Silent as a lamb,

Leaving me to fight,

This battle damned.

Oh voices in my head,

It’s true I cursed you;

Asked you to go away,

But you took it literally, and silently faded away.

Into the night you’re gone,

But my pain hasn’t receded;

And all that could go wrong

Without you, has in coming true succeeded.

Voices in my head,

Now I’m paying for not listening to you,

But it is your fault,

For I loved, and you didn’t stop me too.

TIME MENDS

2011-04-17T04:50:00.000-07:00

It starts with 'hi',

Moving on to a joke;

Before you know it,

You're a gone bloke.

The friendship deepens,

The ties grow strong,

You feel like you have

A shoulder to cry on.

And even though that's true,

You're misreading it my dear,

For of breaking their heart,

You should have no fear.

For they never loved you,

At least not in the way you thought,

And now you're just someone

With their nerves fraught.

But that doesn't really matter,

For you're still a friend,

And every other sorrow,

Time will mend.

Over You

2011-01-25T09:52:00.000-08:00

Does it sound like the title of a song?

I don't care,

‘Coz I swear,

I have moved on.

It took a while,

That is certainly true,

But don't turn blue,

With you now I am through.

All the yearning,

The pain, the love songs,

Make me feel nothing,

‘Coz I have moved on.

You'd moved on a while ago,

You seemed to be happy too.

But it took a little longer still,

For me to not love you.

I was tired of not knowing

When I'd be free,

Of thinking incessantly

If you were missing me.

But of course you weren't;

You had started anew,

Leaving me with nothing

But memories few.

Well I guess it was worth it,

Knowing why it didn't work with you,

In the future I will make sure;

Now I know what to do.

You were intelligent and romantic,

You knew just what to say,

To make me forget my anger,

To make my resolve sway.

But you thought too much of yourself,

Blaming me and calling me names;

Never did you stop to think,

Was there any truth to your claims?

I loved you deeply,

More than you'll ever know,

And you thought my reluctance

Was my ego.

And so you had to look better,

Never could you be vulnerable,

And so you put an end

To this lovely fable.

If your pride can be hurt then,

Mine can be dented too,

And if you hadn't stopped me,

I would still have said no to you.

Three long years it has been,

Since that fateful day,

And how much I suffered since then,

I can't even begin to say.

Our paths separated long ago,

Though I kept looking back,

But I won't any more,

‘Coz I've taken a different track.

I took a turn;

An unknown bend,

But without you there,

My heart has had time to mend.

So here's wishing you a happy life,

One that is safe and long,

I can wish for all these things,

Because buddy, I've moved on.

Us

2010-09-15T05:03:00.000-07:00

What happened

To the eight of Us?

Why are there

So few left to trust?

The first one went,

No one knew for sure why.

It seemed another one of us was the reason,

Though it was denied.

The second one left,

Greener pastures he’d found.

But did that mean he had to quit,

This friendship sound?

The third went too,

His pride being hurt,

Another one of Us was the cause,

This thought did in that person’s mind lurk.

The fourth had

News horizons to explore,

But he’s not really gone;

The hope is that he’ll stick around some more.

The fifth left too,

On a bad note,

Sad though it is,

One of us had yet again rocked the boat.

That leaves just three,

Who need to adjust;

Look beyond the friendships,

Which have turned to dust.

If so many have left

Because of each other,

It may seem like

They’re not meant to be together.

But that is untrue,

For if one leaves due to the other,

The remaining will

Still worry and bother.

But there’ll never be eight again,

And it’s certainly not just,

That now there are only three,

Instead of eight of Us.

Back Again

2009-08-28T12:33:00.000-07:00

No, my English is not poor,
I mean what I say.
Someone I thought long gone
Is back, but is he here to stay?

The last time we parted,
There was a lot of sorrow.
And that is something
Which, I don’t want on the morrow.

So what is the problem you say,
Just walk away,
I wish it were that easy,
For a person not to sway.

He was here again today,
Being very nice,
But in his eyes I saw,
All the old lies.

So there, I’ve done it,
I have sent him back,
And if he ever comes back again,
I’ll not be a jack(ass)!!

Gone with the wind... Not quite!

2009-08-28T12:31:00.000-07:00

Just when you think someone’s out of your life for good, why do they surface again? Is there an explanation to this? Is this supposed to be an indication from above regarding that person? Especially if you’ve ended relations with that person on a bad note, what then? Do you go back to being “friends” because of the “signs”, or do you think, “To hell with the signs, I’m never going to speak with him/her again?” And what about your mental state? Don’t you feel as if your head will explode from the innumerable questions running through it? The ifs, whys and wherefores? Well, mine sure is!

“We really cared about you”

2009-07-02T12:51:00.001-07:00

“If you enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing the same, then everything in between can be dealt with.” These words were spoken by the king of pop who is now gone, but who will continue to live on as a legend. The man with a glove on one hand, the man who invented the concept of music videos, the man whose dance moves “thrilled” millions, Michael Jackson, is no more.

Michael Joseph Jackson, or MJ, as he came to be popularly known, was born in Gary, Indiana, on August 29, 1958, the seventh of nine children. At 1.14pm on Thursday, June 25, 2009, MJ was brought to the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA) medical centre in a state of coma after having said to suffer a cardiac arrest. The emergency physicians there kept up efforts to save him for about an hour, but to no avail.

MJ had a troubled childhood, but that didn’t perturb him, and by the time he was six years old, he, along with four of his brothers – Jackie, Tito, Jermaine and Marlon, performed for the first time at a talent show, where they won the first prize. They formed a group called “The Jackson Five” (later known as “The Jackson 5”), of which MJ became the most popular.

MJ recorded his first solo album, Off The Wall, as an adult recording artist with Quincey Jones in 1979, but he became the man we know and love now in 1982, when he released “Thriller”, which was a smashing hit and topped the American Top 10 charts for 37 consecutive weeks. The next milestone in this man’s colourful life came in 1983, when he unveiled his signature “moonwalk” dance step while performing “Billie Jean” in a television special. The effect that move had, and continues to have on millions till date, is undoubted. Thereafter came the albums “Bad”, “Dangerous” and “HIStory”, though none of them received the kind of success that Thriller did.

MJ bought a 2,600 acre ranch worth $17 million in California in 1988, and named it “Neverland” after the name of the land of his fictitious idol, Peter Pan. MJ was accused of sexually abusing a 13-year-old boy in Neverland in 1993. This, as well as other charges of child abuse, further tainted the man’s already tarnished image, although he was, at the end of the trial, acquitted on all charges.

It was also around this time that news of his increasingly bizarre behaviour started pouring in. However, according to an editorial by journalist and author Indrajit Hazra in the Hindustan Times (HT), “Wacko Jacko never really took shape” in India. So, when news came that he would be performing in Mumbai, the excitement in the air was almost tangible. Finally, on November 1, 1996, Jackson, glittering in a spacesuit, thrilled all audiences – old, young, celebrities, non-celebrities and politicians – with his dazzling performance. Such was the performance, that the atmosphere at the Andheri Sports complex, where the concert was held, was electric. Singer, producer and former VJ, Luke Kenny, said in an editorial in HT, “He did a bit in a crane where the crane passed over the audience… I would like to believe that for a split second he kind of looked at me!” This was also the time when one of the most oft-quoted phrases came about – “He even used my toilet,” said Shiv Sena chief Bal Thackeray, whom Jackson paid a visit in order to use his loo.

Owing to the cost of maintaining Neverland and on account of a failing career, MJ’s financial condition was not too good. Post his death, it was heard that he was in fact being pressurised to undertake a 10-concert tour which was to be held in London starting later this July. That preparations for the concert were taking a toll on his health was one of the speculations that surrounded his sudden death. The concert, ironically, was named “This is it”.

As a child, MJ had had a troubled relationship with an abusive father, but he couldn’t find solace in relationships even as an adult. He married Lisa Marie, Elvis Presley’s only daughter in 1994, but they got divorced in 1996. He married Debbie Rowe in the same year and had two children by her, Prince Michael I and Paris Michael, before splitting with her in 1999. He is also survived by a third child, Prince Michael II, whose mother’s identity is unknown.

The negativity and controversies aside, the fact that the man was a sheer genius is evident in the fact that he won 13 Grammies throughout his career and over 750 million copies of his records were sold. His work and style have been an inspiration to countless, some of them being well-known faces in the Indian music and film industry. Shiamak Davar, choreographer and singer, said to HT, “Jacko will be remembered as a complete performer. Fans like me went crazy watching him perform.” Farah Khan, Bollywood choreographer and director, also told HT, “He is my guru. My dream was to choreograph a dance piece for him. It’ll never come true now.”

No sooner did the news of his demise start trickling in, than the cyber world became frenzied in its rush to know exactly what had happened to MJ. Search engines such as Google, social networking sites such as Twitter and Facebook, and others like YouTube crashed due to the sheer number of people seeking information. However, while millions will miss the man’s music, some are also of the opinion that he was indeed a paedophile, as he was accused of being. Said Anand, aka Sandy, who studies at Hyderabad Central University, “He may be remembered as a great performer, but he will also be remembered as a paedophile.” Another person, Saurabh Mehta, said, “I have never been a great fan of his. In fact, I never understood his style of music.”
But while some will miss the man’s dance moves and others his eccentricities, the fact remains that be missed he will. So, in the end, all I “wanna” say is that we (a lot of us, in any case) really cared about you, MJ!

Timeless jewel

2009-07-01T07:40:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: With inputs from older brother!

From the richest to the poorest, oldest to youngest, everyone identifies with this miracle of Mumbai – the Queen’s Necklace. The Queen’s Necklace is nothing but Marine Drive, and is so called, because when looked at from a high altitude, especially at night, owing to all the sparkling lights of the city that never sleeps, the area around the sea, right from Nariman Point to Chowpatty, is lit up, thus giving the effect of a dazzling jewel.

The places which make up this fabulous jewel, are favourite hangouts for people of all ages and from all walks of life. All of them can be found here, enjoying themselves. Says Nasir Engineer, a student of Jai Hind college (students frequent Marine Drive due to its proximity to the college), “Every time lectures get cancelled, or we don’t feel like sitting for a particularly boring lecture, we come here. It’s so much fun!” There are many others who share his sentiment. Nupur Sariya, who works near Chowpatty, says, “During lunch breaks at work, I come here sometimes. I know it’s sunny, especially in the summers, but then I sit under the shade of a tree on the bench, and just sit back and relax. Alternately, I also go to Cafe Coffee Day on the opposite side of the road in the evenings at times with friends. Just being near the sea gives a sense of serenity and calmness.”

The people who love being close to the sea would anyway have enjoyed going to the sea face, but ever since the beautification project was undertaken – and completed – near Marine Drive, the area has become even more beautiful and inviting. An entire promenade has been created, complete with trees along the way. Another positive step taken towards making this jewel even more appealing, was the clearance of all the hawkers from the main beach at Chowpatty. While it’s true that Chowpatty would be incomplete without its pani puri and bhel puriwalas, they sure were a nuisance when they used to spread right across the beach. Also, the Chowpatty beach is now much cleaner than it used to be before, which is a definite plus.

And who can forget the ghoda gadiwalas! Magnificent chariot seats atop resplendent (or not so resplendent) horses, the breeze in your face while the horse’s hoofs go clippety clop; what more could you ask for? Lower rates for the rides, that’s one thing for sure! A ride from Nariman Point to Chowpatty would cost you anywhere between Rs. 250 – 350! Ask them why they charge so much, and the owners of the carriages – such as Masoud bhai tangewale – say that feeding the horse alone costs so much; like you alone are supposed to be paying for that!

Marine Drive was the very place which saw the man whom we all know as King Khan now, say to his friend, “I will be the king of this city one day.” And, well, the sea bears witness to the coming true of this declaration, and probably many more such beliefs, hopes and dreams, that we may know nothing of. The Queen’s Necklace has become immortal in Indian cinema; right from Ashok Kumar to Akshay Kumar, Sunil Dutt to Sanjay Dutt, and Chalti ka Naam Gadi to Lagey Raho Munnabhai!

However, apart from all the good things connected with the Queen’s Necklace, if one looks closer than the twinkling lights, the water of the Arabian Sea is not exactly crystal clear, but for that, nobody but the public is to blame. Mrs. Shirin Mehta, who lives in NCPA Apartments facing the sea at Nariman Point, says, “It’s great to be living here, but, sometimes, when I’m standing at the window, and see people throwing plastic bottles and whole bags of litter into the sea, I get very upset. Once or twice when I was out and saw this happening, I reprimanded the lady who was tossing things in the water, but she just gave me a nasty look and walked away.”

Mrs. Mehta’s complaints, however, are not the lawmakers’ only worries. Apart from this problem, the law also has to make sure to secure the coastal areas, so that another 26/11 does not take place in Mumbai. After the carnage at the Taj, the Oberoi and the Trident, among other places in South Mumbai, securing the coastal areas has become the need of the hour.

Apart from the pressing and serious matter of coastal security, there is also the matter of the area being a lovers’ point. In this day and age, where everyone has a fundamental right to freedom, this freedom is taken very literally by some. While the stand of certain political parties or the ‘moral brigade’ tends to be extreme on this issue, wherein couples indulge in PDA (Public Display of Affection), some people just carry it too far. Sunita, a young girl, who was enjoying some blissful moments with her boyfriend at Chowpatty, said, “As long as couples do not indulge in behaviour that is over the top and can be embarrassing to others around them, I don’t see any harm in couples sitting together. But this concept of the ‘moral police’ is ridiculous. How can you threaten people for holding hands?” asked a bewildered Sunita, and her partner couldn’t agree more.

Thus, the Queen’s Necklace epitomises the essence of Mumbai – where, irrespective of joys and sorrows, ups and downs, the poor man can enjoy himself while looking out at the sea, or the rich man while relaxing in a horse carriage; for after all, what is this, if not the Mumbai that draws people from around the world, the Mumbai that everyone loves, the Mumbai of our dreams.

The Mirror

2009-05-03T07:18:00.000-07:00

You have so many hopes, so many aspirations. Yet, you live for those around you; for those you love. Not that you’re complaining, because you truly love them, and want to do something in return for all that they’ve done for you. But sometimes you just want to do something for yourself. Problem is, you don’t know what.

When it comes to others, you know what you can – or should – do for them; it’s simple. They want something – you give it to them. But that’s because they know what they want, you don’t. Even if it’s not possible for you to give them something, you try your darnedest, and when you still can’t, then you continue to feel bad about it.

As each day passes, you want something else, you covet something new. Yet, you don’t try to get it, because you’re too scared to try; you’ve already assumed you are going to fail. With others, you don’t feel like that; you don’t feel their failure. Therefore it is easier for you to give them what they want.

You like to see people that you love happy, but what makes you happy? This, what you’re doing now, or something else? Do you like to listen to music, or are you happier when you dance, or perhaps when you read? Or maybe when you write?

Why am I talking about you? Probably for the same reason as I’m afraid to admit that you are a mirror.

She was scared

2009-05-03T07:17:00.000-07:00

She was scared to try out new things,
For she thought she would fail,
She never would have imagined,
That her ship, too, could set sail.

She had lived like a loner,
All her life,
Most of which had been,
Laden with personal strife.

She used to lie to people,
And say she was fine,
When, in reality,
She was always out of line.

She had friends whom she loved,
But she couldn’t tell them that,
And one fine day she found
Herself, alone on the field to bat.

She loved a man, too,
But she didn’t know it,
She thought he wasn’t worth it,
And so she didn’t show it.

Then he was gone,
And she knew it was for best,
But her cruel soul,
Wouldn’t let her rest.

She knows that he now has a life,
Which doesn’t include her,
And the thought hurts so much my friend,
That it makes me shudder.

“Today”, she thought to herself,
“I’ll let it all out,”
“I’ll make myself free somehow,”
As her heart thudded loud.

And she knew she wouldn’t sleep that night,
Not with her heart brimming,
But the ways of the heart are strange for sure,
And soon, she was dreaming!

Dear Diary

2009-05-03T07:15:00.000-07:00

Dear Diary,
Today, I spoke to one of my closest friends over the phone after a long, long time. Ours is a story very common, yet unique. We started out the way many people who later become the best of friends do – as enemies. Well, not enemies exactly, but we never got along well. For some reason, he had decided to dislike me and make it known to me that he disliked me! That very often led to bickering amongst us.

We met in junior college, a time when everyone is looking for fresh starts, new friends, boyfriends / girlfriends… we were no different. But this is where the similarity of our relationship with that of many others ends. Because that was one time when we didn’t like the sight of one another, and now is another, when we are very close friends. How it happened, well, neither of us knows, to be very honest (maybe he does, but I certainly don’t). Maybe he realised that I was not the person he really thought I was, which happens when one assumes things about people one doesn’t even know, what you may call prejudice.

So anyway, getting back to the present, after all the good times that we’ve shared, there really haven’t been any bad times – except maybe the times when I thought he was being too insensitive, which I still feel at times, or he thought I was too slow in getting across what I wanted to say, which he still does even today – we’ve reached a point where we don’t need to be in constant touch to know that we’re there for each other, always. Speaking to him today felt really good, as it always does. It brought a smile to my face, like it always does. Sure, he said a lot of things which were absolute rubbish, (which I will fight with him over if he objects, which he will if he ever reads this) but even that felt good to hear, because it’s so him. We chatted for over an hour, and we fought over why I never call him up, which we always do, (lot of ‘always’, I notice) and we flirted, like we always do, both knowing that it was nothing but just a bit of harmless flirting, if there is any such thing. Sure, along the way, we went through a phase where one developed a liking for the other, (I won’t mention who liked who) as is to be expected in any close relationship, and we got over that, because the other person wasn’t ready for it. But now, it seems maybe, just maybe, the other person is ready…

We’ve gone through all of that, and as I’m writing this, for the first time I don’t know how to end this note, which is usually never a problem for me. But again, as I’m writing, a thought strikes me – I don’t know how to end because there is no end. The telephone conversation has ended, but this friendship, not just yet, and as far as I can see, won’t for quite sometime! Amen to that!! So long then, dear diary, take care, get back to you later!!

It rained fours and sixes

2009-04-29T02:30:00.000-07:00

This sure was the case in the 17th match of the IPL – Mumbai Indians (MI) v/s Kolkata Knight Riders (KKR). After a not-so-good performance in the previous matches by both teams, expectations were high among the supporters on both sides.

Sachin Tendulkar, captain of the MI, won the toss and elected to bat first. Right from the start, the two opening batsmen – Tendulkar and Sanath Jayasurya – came down strong on the bowlers of the KKR.

The match saw quite a few landmarks, namely, one of the best totals put up by a team in the first innings, (187 runs), a fantastic partnership between the two openers of the MI, and, the most important of all, Sachin Tendulkar’s highest ever IPL total (68 runs).

Right from the beginning of the match, the KKR looked under pressure (evident from the mis-fielding in the very first ball, and also from the fact that Anureet Singh had to retire while trying to save a four hit by Tendulkar early in the match). The match was especially memorable because not even one wicket had fallen till the end of the first 10 overs. When Tendulkar finally did get out on an LBW appeal, (superb bowling by Lakshmi Shukla), it was not before he had made an amazing 68 runs off only 45 balls.

A surprising development was Harbhajan Singh coming in at 1-down. However, he did his job, and before he fell prey to Mendis, (caught out), he had hit two sixes, and made a total of 18 runs off just eight balls.

Then came Abhishek Nayar and J. P. Duminy, who failed to make any significant contributions. All this while, Jayasurya had stayed put, but finally got out on a ball by Shukla once again. However, he had, by then, made a fantastic 52 runs off only 32 balls. Thereafter, the wickets started falling in quick succession, but by the time the 20 overs were completed, the damage had been done, with the MI ending with a fabulous 187 – 6.

Like they say, ‘the game of cricket is never over until it’s over’, expectations were once again riding high on the openers of the KKR, Brendon McCullum and Chris Gayle. However, due to immense pressure on the two, only four runs were made in the first over. Soon, the wickets started falling as first McCullum (who got out on a ball by Lasith Malinga; one run off six balls) and then Gayle (ball – Bravo, catch – Tendulkar; 12 runs off 11 balls) got out. Former captain of the KKR, Saurav Ganguly, and Brad Hodge managed to get a 50 run partnership off 39 balls, but just when things were beginning to look up, they got out, too. From then on, it was a downward fall for the KKR, and before they knew it, they were all out after having made only 95 runs, thus losing by more that 90 runs, one of the worst scores ever by any team in an IPL match.

From the get-go, the MI looked determined to win the match. The ‘DLF Maximum’ award for hitting the maximum number of sixes was shared by the two openers of the MI, Tendulkar and Jayasurya, and the Man of the Match prize was also given to Tendulkar, while Lasith Malinga claimed the purple cap for taking the maximum number of wickets in the series till now.
By far one of the most entertaining matches in the season so far, this victory scooted the MI to the third position (where they must be very happy to be) and looking to make it to the top spot.

Match made in heaven

2009-04-29T02:28:00.000-07:00

One can surely say that about the 15th match of the IPL, held on April 26, 2009, between King’s XI Punjab and Rajasthan Royals.

What started out as a fantastic game for the Rajasthan Royals, (what with the first wicket falling on the very first ball of the innings) soon became anybody’s match. After the fall of four wickets, all in quick succession of one another, the King’s XI looked under mighty pressure.

None of the players from the team of Punjab managed to stay on the field for very long under the expert bowling of Kamran Khan, and excellent fielding by Asnodkar (responsible for the fall of Karan Goel’s wicket on the very first ball due to stumping) and the rest of the team.

After the fall of the wickets of Yuvraj Singh – who looked very upset about it – and Irfan Pathan – who made sure that the team made a respectable total – it looked like all was lost. But the saving grace (and eventual Man of the Match) for the King’s XI, was Kumara Sangakarra, with his commendable 60 runs off only 51 balls. At the end of 20 overs, King’s XI Punjab were 6 wickets down and had managed to make a decent, if not great, 139 runs, while in the beginning, a total of even 120 looked difficult for them.

Then, it was the turn of the defending champions to bat. It looked like an easy total which they should have gotten without difficulty, but Irfan Pathan, still going strong and carrying on in the bowling from where he left off in the batting, took two important top order wickets. Soon, the wickets started falling, and after the fall of Ravinder Jadeja and Yusuf Pathan’s wickets – the last hopes of the Rajasthan Royals – the team’s fate was pretty-much decided.

Although the Rajasthan Royals lost the match by a big margin, (making this the second win for the King’s XI team on the trot) what is worth mentioning is Shane Warne’s amazing captaincy. He may not have shown his true worth as a bowler, (and indeed, his bowling did contribute to the opposition scoring many runs) his spirit on the field was very encouraging. Although he couldn’t run between the wickets very often, he did make it a point to stay right till the end, and, even while his team was fielding, whenever the opposite team’s player played well, he acknowledged it by applauding. Also, whenever his own team members mis-fielded – unlike other captains – he did not reprimand them; instead, he spoke to them about where they were going wrong; just like a true captain would.
All in all, it was a great game, and while it must have acted as a morale booster for the King’s XI, the Rajasthan Royals can be expected to come back stronger and better the next time!

Exercise your right to not vote

2009-02-18T10:11:00.000-08:00

On Wednesday, February 18, 2009, post-graduate students pursuing their Masters in Communication and Journalism (MCJ) from Mumbai University’s Department of Communication and Journalism held a guest lecture at Sophia College, Mumbai, which was attended by the students of Bachelor of Mass Media (B.M.M.). They spoke about their initiative, ‘Democracy Works’, which makes people aware of Rule 49-O of the Conduct of Indian Election Commission Rules, 1961. Also covering the event was news channel ____.

According to Rule 49-O, a registered voter can exercise his/her right not to vote for any candidate during elections. With the elections around the corner, this session was made all the more important. One of the speakers, Rahul Dubey, a post-graduate student of Journalism at the University of Mumbai, said, “If a voter thinks that the contesting candidates are not worthy of the vote, a ‘No Vote’ can be cast by signing form 17-A on the day of polling.”

Mr. Dubey, along with Mr. _______, who is a ________, explained to the students that this movement to make people aware of their right to cast a no vote was mainly for those individuals who are registered voters, but who do not vote during elections because they believe that none of the candidates deserve to win. This step, then, is a way to ensure ‘one less excuse not to cast a vote’.

The procedure to cast a No Vote is simple. On the day of the elections, voters must go to their respective voting centres, confirm their identity, and sign the register. They must then ask the presiding officer to give them form 17-A, where they must sign, as must the presiding officer. They must not press any buttons on the Electronic Voting Machine (EVM). This will be considered as a No Vote.

While speaking of the empowerment provided to citizens through Rule 49-O, Mr. _____ also pointed out the loopholes which may be a hindrance to the implementation of the rule. He explained by giving a hypothetical situation in which ‘X’ candidate and ‘Y’ candidate contest the elections. If, in such a situation, 70,000 votes are No Votes, followed by 65,000 and 60,000 votes for ‘X’ and ‘Y’ respectively, and ‘X’ were to be declared the winner, ‘Y’ could file a case stating that since 70,000 people voted against ‘X’, the latter can not be elected. In such a case scenario, there would have to be re-polls. To counter this, a student asked what would happen if there were re-polls; would the same people contest, thus leading to re-polls, resulting in an endless cycle? To this, Mr. _____replied that these were hypothetical assumptions which might not take place.

Another point brought to light was that in smaller constituencies, the people who cast a no vote might be known, which could endanger their safety. This, too, needs to be kept in mind and addressed.

In order to inform as many people as possible about ‘Democracy Works’, the students of MCJ, besides speaking with college students, are also trying to spread the message through the mass media, e-mails, SMSes, and word of mouth. After all, as Rahul Dubey said, “We have forgotten our fundamental right to vote, which is exercised even when we cast a No Vote.” And the time to begin exercising it is now.

A Friend Is All I Want

2008-12-27T01:34:00.000-08:00

A friend is all I want,
A friend is all I need,
A friend who can,
Make me feel less incomplete.

A friend who is always ‘there’,
Not ‘here today, gone tomorrow’,
A friend who can share,
All my joys and all my sorrow.

A friend who will stand by me
Even if I ask for something wrong,
Because, that friend knows just what it is,
To feel having loved and lost.

Because this friend knows,
The way I think and feel.
The way I dread any threat;
What my friendship means to me.

A friend who can understand
My need to feel needed,
A friend who can tolerate,
My constant nagging and teasing.

It may be a lot to ask for,
In this day and age,
But if I find that friend somewhere,
I would never again be incomplete.

I would never cry again at night,
Without any reason,
I’d be less unhappy, insecure, guilty and lousy;
Perhaps I’d feel less like a loser, if I had that friend with me.

A friend is all I want,
A friend is all I need,
A friend who can,
Make me feel COMPLETE.

On….

2008-12-25T09:20:00.000-08:00

The following is a chat message between me and my friend. I am sure that you must be wondering why I’ve left the topic of this particular conversation blank. But this is one topic I’ll never be able to explain, so I’ll just leave it upto all of you to decide for yourselves.

NOTE: All the names,except mine are fictional, for obvious reason.

Me: Hey! Sorry, got disconnected.
Hetal: It’s all right.
Me: You care a damn about what?
Hetal: Ketan's good side.
Me: OK. In any case, he's not the type to sit and mope around… I am sure he's moved on, and I guess I have, too... it’s just that everytime I think of him or see him, it really hurts, man!
Hetal: Rash ya, just get over him… You know, he’s not a bad guy. Actually he’s just OK… but not your type.
Me: I thought you said he was not good? I am trying to get over him, but it takes me more time than most people. Even if I hate a person, it really stays with me.... even in my hatred I think of that person... which is why I am always so... ‘exaggerating’, like Tarun says... I can’t let go easily.
Me: Anyway, I have been, and probably always will be, a hopeless case. Forget it. Maybe someday I'll learn... (fat chance, though).
Hetal: Ha ha ha.
Me: Oh, by the way, I don’t think I need to tell you that this remains between us. Why are you laughing?
Hetal: Chill, Rash. Life screws you, but you gotta move on.
Me: Actually, do, I'll laugh with you. Yeah I know…
Hetal: Didn’t get you?!
Me: You were laughing, so I said, “Actually, do, I'll laugh with you”. But, jokes aside, I don’t think I need to tell you that this conversation remains between us?
Hetal: Yeah obviously.
Me: Please don’t – even by mistake – ever mention it, or I'll never be able to live it down!
Hetal: I won’t! Trust me.
Me: I know you won't.
Hetal: Merci.
Me: Anyway, hey, am so sorry for screwing up your mood also... just that I had to tell one of you at least... I felt like I was being eaten up inside.
Hetal: Hey, who said my mood is screwed?
Me: If it ain't that's great!
Hetal: In fact I’m glad that I could be of some use for you to lighten up.
Me: Friends don't need to be 'of use', Hetal, not for me, anyway... as long as they care... I am very happy.
Hetal: I really care and don’t you ever forget that.
Me: I do know that.

Epilogue: I know, this one’s really dramatic. I do sound so filmy. But sometimes one just can’t keep one’s feelings with oneself. That’s exactly how I felt when I spoke to Hetal. This is one of my favourites because not only does it talk about a person whom maybe I once liked, (as I’m sure you must have guessed), but it also reflects my friendships – not just with Hetal, but with all the people that I have ever considered good friends in my life.

LOST AND … NOT FOUND

2008-10-10T07:53:00.000-07:00

– My Experience

I have possibly set a record by now for having lost the maximum number of wallets. Just today, I’ve lost yet another one.
Sometimes I’m lucky enough not to have been carrying money on me when I lose my wallets, but today this was not the case. I actually had more than Rs. 200 in my wallet, but that’s immaterial. I had my ID cards, and, most importantly, my house keys!! Add to this the fact that I had an exam paper for which I was as unprepared as unprepared can get, and you can begin to imagine what I felt; not completely, that is impossible to do until one actually faces the situation oneself, but, you can at least begin to sympathise, if not empathise, with me.
The keys that were there in my wallet were those of the Godrej lock, the kind that are in – built in your door. But, other than that, I was also carrying the keys to the other, external lock, just in case we use it sometime. So, now, not only the Godrej lock keys, but also those of the external lock are of no use, because I can’t possibly use the external lock again, given that I literally gave an invitation to any robber, what with my address on the ID cards and BOTH the keys!!!
Had it been sometime since this whole incident had happened, I might have even been able to look at it with some humour. But it’s not been too long, and, considering that I’m sitting on the steps outside my door, waiting for my friends to bring me the spare keys from my brother’s shop while I came here to guard over the door, it is not so funny. Even as I’m writing this last sentence, I’m wondering when my helpful friends, Tusharika and Krunali, will be back so I can get into the house and knock about a few things that no robber has yet dared to come and already do, in order to vent my frustration!!! (PUNCH)!!!!

On one ear…

2008-09-15T07:30:00.000-07:00

Sounds funny, doesn’t it? Well, it’s the truth. Ask me. I’ve been listening and hearing things only partially since the last ten odd days, thanks to the deafness of my right ear. Frankly, it’s not all righty’s (for convenience purposes, I’ll refer to my right ear as righty and its left counterpart at lefty) fault. Two days back in the morning, righty had popped and I could hear the music of the world. (Yes, it’s true, only when you’re deprived of something, you realise how much it’s worth.) However, being the mischief-maker that he is, righty soon decided to block up again and leave me with no option but to ask people to either scream themselves hoarse, (I’m not exaggerating, I’ve always been slightly deaf as compared to other people) or to stand on my left so that dear lefty could do the needful. Hope all this isn’t confusing you.

It’s really not funny. Definitely not when you are in college and one of your dear darling professors decides to play Chinese whispers with the whole class at the same time, especially while taking what most students (excluding me, mind you,) live for – ATTENDANCE. So if I miss attendance, which I thankfully haven’t as yet, I’d have to let myself to be considered absent, in spite of the fact that my physical self and my dynamic personality (alright, not dynamic personality, my voice, happy?) just cannot allow it!

Imagine being left out of games like the afore mentioned Chinese Whispers and Dumb Charades for fear that if you are included, the other team will win, purely because you have to be told loudly enough for the Chinese whisper to reach Japan!

Oh yes, I know what you’re thinking. In some cases, it is also a boon. I guess you’ve already figured out what those small mercies of God are – shouting classmates, scolding parents, boring professors… you get the drift. But trust me, a day or two of this stuff, and you’re ready to get back to having the use of both precious ears! After all, how else can one put into action the famous saying, “In through one ear, out the other”. So while I have my five senses in tact, [no, I am not THAT bad at Math, I mean five senses, my sixth sense, clairsentience, as it is called, (go check a dictionary) is currently serving as my fifth sense, understood, Mr. wise guy?] I want my sixth sense, or, in actuality, my fifth sense, back as soon as possible.
Wait a minute. That last sentence was really confusing, wasn’t it? Well, basically what I mean is… I WANT MY HEARING POWERS BACK, ASAP!!!

FOUND AND LOST

2008-09-05T12:29:00.000-07:00

This was Tuesday. On Wednesday, after a busy morning at home, she entered a nearby cafe and ordered a small sandwhich. She began reading the magazine that she had brought with her. She sensed a presence at the table and expected it to be the waiter, but her words died on her lips before she could utter them. For the man standing there was no waiter. He was Justin. Justin, the man she hated, Justin, the man she loved… As it did all those years ago, his nearness made her heart beat faster. Justin wasn’t a man of extraordinary good looks. Neither was she, Sarah Joseph, an easily impressed woman. But this man…

“You!” she exclaimed. In all fairness, Sarah was never soft. She had the kind of voice which always seemed loud, no matter how softly she spoke. And so, people around turned to see what had happened to make this beautiful lady scream like the devil were after her. “What are you doing here?” she asked, lowering her voice. Cool as ever, he replied with that soft timber in his voice, “Last time I checked, people came to cafes for refreshments. Don’t know if things have changed a lot since then.” He pushed a chair back with his foot and sat down carefully, as if afraid of something. “So you still read sports magazines. Haven’t changed much, have you?” he asked once he’d settled down.

“Not everyone changes as rapidly as you,” she told him acidly. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go.”

“Won’t you at least ask how I’ve been?”

“I couldn’t care less,” she said, and gathering her belongings, walked off without looking back.

Once she was a good distance away, Sarah released the breath she hadn’t even been aware she was holding. Where had this man come from so suddenly and why was he here? What did he want from her after so long? What was it that Mary had told her yesterday? “That man was a fiend!” Yes, that was what she had said. And Sarah had told her that now that he was gone, there was no point in talking about him. In fact, she’d been keener on watching Michael Schumacher on television rather than listening to her childhood friend. At least that was what she had told her. What she really wanted was nothing more than an explanation from Justin. She wouldn’t even blame him; she just needed answers. He’d been gone five years without a trace.

She had been aware of Mary saying something about Samantha to her, but she wasn’t really listening. She had had enough on her mind without having to worry about her best friend’s daughter. They had been at Sarah’s house. A cosy little place, conveniently located in Manhattan, but empty. Empty because there were no family conversations in the living room, no fights between siblings at the dining table, no lovers’ disputes in the bedroom. Empty because she was alone… Now. But she hadn’t always been alone. She had known, briefly, a similar bliss, a bliss she had shared with Justin. She had been shaken out of her reverie when Mary had touched her arm and she’d looked up guiltily, realising that she hadn’t been listening to her friend at all.

But all this was yesterday, Tuesday. Today, on Wednesday, everything had changed. Once again she was facing the same dilemma as she had when Justin had left her after three years of a steady relationship — without giving any reason — but this time, for coming back. She reached her flat and took some comfort in its familiarity. The advantage of being a freelance writer was that she could work from home at her leisure. She took a bottle of soda from the refrigerator and sat to complete the short story that she had begun earlier.

However, her thoughts began to wander. There was something that had struck her as odd when she had met Justin at the cafe, but she hadn’t been able to recollect what it was. Now she knew. She hadn’t waited long, but she remembered seeing that Justin had worn a jacket over a neatly pressed shirt. And Justin hated jackets. “Makes me feel claustrophobic,” he used to say. Moreover, the jacket had been draped over his shoulders, he wasn’t actually wearing it; and that had given him a careless, untidy look. If there was one thing about Justin, it was that he was never untidy. “A lot has changed since he left, the least of that being his dressing sense,” Sarah chided herself.

She tried to focus on what she was doing, but her mind strayed again. There was something about the way he’d sat at the table… “Stop it!” she shouted aloud to herself and called herself all kinds of a fool for worrying so much, and for a guy like Justin at that. She got back to writing the story and was able, by the end, to give Jason and Susan a happy ending. “How ironic,” she thought, “Jason and Susan… Justin and Sarah.” The thought brought a mirthless smile to her face. It was already touching seven o’ clock by the time she finished writing her story, so she left her apartment to grab a quick bite to eat. She knew she should stop eating out so much, but she was in no mood to cook today. If she could swallow a bite or two, it would be an achievement.

But on her way, she ran into Mary. “Hello there. Where are you off to?” Mary asked her.

“Just going to catch a quick supper.”

“No way are you eating out again. Come on home. Alex is out, we’ll eat together. You can meet Samantha as well, she’s been asking about her Godmother.”

Sarah hesitated only for a moment. After all, she hadn’t met the little angel in quite some time. Once at Mary’s house, Sarah decided to confide in her. By the time she finished telling her, Mary was purple with rage. “How dare he! The creep!” Sarah tried to get her friend to calm down, and wouldn’t have succeeded if Samantha hadn’t walked into the kitchen at that very instant and promptly planted herself in Sarah’s lap. After supper, Sarah waited till Samantha fell asleep, and left with Mary’s words fresh in her mind. “I don’t know why he’s here, but don’t let him near you. I can’t see you get hurt again.”

On reaching home, she started another story, and due to the fatigue of the day, fell asleep at her desk. She awoke directly late next morning and went to make herself a cup of coffee. But there was none in the house, so once more she headed towards the cafe to have some coffee and a decent breakfast because she had barely picked at her food at Mary’s. As she sat in a corner of the almost full cafe, Philip, the waiter, who knew her well by now, took her order. When he returned with it, he handed her a letter.

“A gentleman asked me to give you this, miss. He told me your name and asked me if I knew you and when I said yes, gave it to me and requested that I hand it to you whenever you came next.”
Sarah felt a sinking feeling in her stomach. “Did he say who he was?”

“No, I’m sorry, he didn’t say, miss.”

“Thank you, Philip.” Sarah tried to open the envelope, but her fingers shook terribly. Finally she managed to open it. “Dearest Sarah,” it began. Sarah drew in a deep breath, but read on.

Dearest Sarah,
I know you hate me, as you have every right to, for what I did to you was unforgivable. The only reason I am writing to you after so long, is because I couldn’t leave again without letting you know how much I love you. Because I do. I love you with all my heart and I couldn’t bear to let you think otherwise. If you cannot forgive me, at least try not to hate me.

Forever yours,
Justin

Sarah realised she was crying. And she was puzzled. What did the letter mean? Also, the handwriting was most definitely not Justin’s. Yet, somehow, it looked familiar. Suddenly she knew. She got up, payed for her untouched breakfast hastily, and, leaving a tip for Philip, took a cab to Mary’s house. She found Mary reading a book. “It’s funny, you know,” she said without preamble. “I just received a letter from Justin, but guess what, he’s not written it!” Mary blanched, but regained her composure quickly.

“Well, he must have had someone else write it. What does he want now?”

“Yes, he got someone else to write it. But who? And can’t you guess what he had to say? After all, you did write the letter for him!”

Mary tried to speak, but Sarah went on. “What’s going on, Mary? Come on, I know he’s been talking to you.” Sarah was glad Mary was alone at home. She wouldn’t have liked to confront her with Alex and Samantha around.

“Well… you remember Justin met you yesterday?” Mary asked Sarah.

“Am I likely to forget that any time soon?”

“Sorry, no, of course not. So did you happen to notice what he was wearing?”

“A pair of jeans, a shirt, silk, if it’s of any interest to you, and a jacket. But —”

“Yes. A jacket. And I know as well as you obviously do that Justin —”

“— Hates jackets,” Sarah cut in. “So?”

“You must have thought it rather odd.”

“Well, even if I did, what of it?” she asked, getting irritated by this mindless question and answer session.

“And did he shake hands with you?”

“No, he didn’t. He just came out of nowhere, was wearing a jacket, didn’t shake hands with me, pushed back a chair with his foot, and sat down on it! I’ve told you all there was to tell, but what in heavens has that got to do with —” Sarah stopped speaking and grew so white, Mary thought she would faint.

“Sarah, are you alright? I’m sorry, but he knew I am your best friend and asked me to write to you. He didn’t know anyone else. He came by early today morning. I was very angry when I saw him, but he dropped his jacket, and then… and then I knew.”

“What… how… when,” stuttered Sarah, unable to form a complete sentence.

“Two days after you left for Chicago to meet your aunt. He was at the factory when something went wrong with the machinery. He decided to take a look for himself and suddenly the machine he was examining started, and — Sarah?”

Sarah looked dazed. “Why did he leave? Why didn’t he tell me?” But she already knew why. He hadn’t wanted to see her hurt, and hurt she would be, by the thought of those arms never carrying all her shopping bags, of never holding her again, of… So he had decided to make her hate him by deserting her instead. He’d even sold the factory, and no one had known where he went. “Where is he now? I will kill him for running off on me like that,” she said, but she knew she would do no such thing. Again Mary looked uncomfortable as if she’d dreaded this question. “He said I was not to tell you about the letter, but we should’ve known you’d guess. He… he left, but he didn’t tell me where he was going either, I swear. I tried to stop him, but he — Sarah, Sarah! Wait, where are you going?”

But Sarah left the house, and, as if in a trance, walked to the river, the place that gave her solace. But today the river would do more than just give her solace. She touched her bag. Once she reached the river, she removed the thin, round metal object which glinted in the sun. She had always carried it with her, thinking she herself would be ready whenever he asked. She still carried it with her. But she wouldn’t need it anymore.

“This post is the official entry to Star World Betty of Elle Contest- http://www.starworld.in/”

Entering this contest will give me a chance at winning an internship with Elle magazine, which is a leader in the field of fashion and beauty writing. I'm a student of mass media and have always wanted to be a writer. After having interned with one magazine and written for some others, this internship with Elle will only help me learn more and take my growth curve ahead. The internship will be help me grow as a writer and add to not only my portfolio, but also my confidence of being a writer, and I'm therefore keen on winning it!

P.S.: “Ugly Betty” sure is great inspiration!

A KITE

2008-09-05T00:00:00.000-07:00

FAR AWAY
ON A MOONLIT NIGHT,
THERE FELL UPON THE RIVER
A HIGH FLYING KITE.

SO MAGNIFICENT
AND SO BRIGHT,
WHEN SEEN IN THE MORN
BROUGHT PEOPLE DELIGHT.

NO ONE KNEW
FROM WHENCE IT CAME,
BUT THEY KNEW FOR SURE
IT WASN’T ANYONE’S GAME.

FOR IT SHOWED
TWO LOVERS YOUNG,
EACH OF WHOM
TO THE OTHER CLUNG.

ON THEIR FACES
WAS A GLOW,
FROM LOVE OR PAIN,
WAS FOR NAUGHT TO KNOW.

A CHILD SO EXCITED
AS IF ON CUE,
CAUGHT IT AT THE BANK,
BEHIND IT THE WORDS, ‘I LOVE YOU’.

FAR AWAY
ON A MOONLIT NIGHT,
MOURNED A MOTHER
HER CHILD’S PLIGHT.